Stop My Divorce

Divorces are at an all time high.  Sometimes it seems that it’s easier to get a divorce than to get married. 

People get hurt in divorce.  The parties are forever scarred.  Children, if there are any, never get over the hurt.  Knowing this, you may be wondering “How do I stop my divorce?”

There are three steps to stopping a divorce. 

The first thing that you have to realize is that saying you’ve changed does not mean you really have changed.  If you are the person who is at fault in the relationship, it’s not enough to give lip service to the idea of change.

If you have been having affairs, for instance, it is going to take time for your partner to believe that you are no longer going back to your wandering ways.  It is not enough to tell your partner that you’re not stepping out anymore.  You will have to take concrete actions.  As an example, you may need to allow your partner to “monitor” your activities by checking in with him or her on a frequent basis.  If your job requires you to travel, you may have to look for a new job that keeps you close to home.

Other things besides affairs can mess up a relationship.  For instance, if the wife’s spending habits are causing money problems which weaken the marriage, she may have to commit to cutting up the credit cards and living on a cash allowance.  If the husband’s work habits keep him away from home too often, he may have to commit to being home by 6:30 every night no matter what.  At the crux of this step is what is the most important thing in your life?  If it is your marriage, you will make the necessary changes.  But don’t just give lip service to them.  Actions speak louder than words.

The next step is to avoid using emotional blackmail if you want to stop your divorce.  Recognize that love is NOT enough to save your marriage.  Telling your partner, “but I love you” in the heat of an argument will not win you any points.  When you say “I love you” at inappropriate times, your partner is forced to say “I love you, BUT…”  this weakens the emotional tie that love has between you.

Use the powerful “I love you” message when your wounds are mended, not at the heat of an argument. 

You can’t use logic or guilt to change your partner’s mind.  Arguing like this will only involve a spiraling argument.  If you feel you must win, then you will lose.  

Finally, don’t think that you can win an argument.  Some people like to use their superior logic or argumentative skills to “prove” they are right and their partner is wrong.  This may work in a formally scored debate, but in a marriage (which is scored on emotions not facts) it’s sure to fail.  Instead of arguing, solve the problem.  If your spouse brings up a fault in you, discuss possible solutions rather than argue back. 

Are you wondering how to “stop my divorce?”  Start by following the “stop my divorce” advice I’ve laid out in this article.

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A Piece of Advice: How to Keep a Woman Happy

Do you know how to keep a woman happy?  Here is some advice on relationships for men.

The first advice on relationships item I have for you is to always be yourself.  Many men don’t feel that they are good enough to catch a beautiful, sexy woman, so they put on a show.  But a confident man is the sexiest beast around.  Have you ever noticed that some of the ugliest guys have some of the prettiest women?  That is because they display a level of confidence that is more attractive to women than physical looks.

Next, you should do the little things.  This means offering to take her car in for an oil change or giving her a bag of Jelly Bellies (her favorite flavors) from time to time.  Sometimes men think in terms of “grand gestures,” when it is the little things add up to long relationships.

This ties into the next piece of advice on relationships: appreciate her.  You shouldn’t take her for granted.  Let her know that you value her.

Next up is not obviously looking at other women when you are with her.  Women think that you are comparing her to the woman you’re looking at.  They don’t understand the whole concept of “the day I stop looking is the day I die.”  This comes from the biological drive for monogamy in women.  Women are looking for a lifetime partner for a man with whom they can raise children.  They can’t help it.  That’s how evolution designed them.  So minimize the ogling, especially when she’s around.

You should try to make her laugh.  While men list good looks at the top of the things they need in a woman, women list a man’s sense of humor.  So, if you want the relationship to last, keep her laughing.

The next bit of advice on relationships comes in seeking common interests.  It’s great if you got together because of a hobby or an interest, but it still helps when you take an interest in a long standing passion of hers.  If this means developing an appreciation for foreign films, so be it.  This shows that you care about her and she’ll know you are one in a million.

Once you get the girl, it may seem like you don’t have to try anymore – at least as far as grooming goes.  And, while women are less sensitive to looks than men are, they still like a man who makes an attempt.  So, shave on weekends.  Keep in touch with the latest fashion trends for men.  In short, don’t get sloppy just because you’ve landed her.  You can unland her just as easily.

She’s going to need to know that she can integrate you into her circle of family and friends.  A man must be part of her larger life, especially after the first few weeks of passion are over.  So, make an effort to get along with her girlfriends and impress her parents.  A woman relies on her social network to validate her relationship choices.  Make an effort.

You should always be considerate of her feelings.  Women are less stable than guys.  Part of this is hormonal.  When you are sensitive to her mood, you won’t get on her bad side.

The final piece of advice on relationships is to be open to trying new things.  At the beginning of a relationship, everything is new from the types of dates you arrange to the way you kiss.  But, after a while, these things become routine.  If you find that your relationship has fallen into a rut, shake things up.  Try something new.  It will go a long way to keeping your relationship healthy.

So, there are ten bits of advice on relationships to keep your dating life strong. Look you guys, these things are common sense and the fact is I almost drove my sweetheart out of my life because I didn't pay attention to what I was doing. There is a book that woke me up written by T 'Dub' Jackson called "The Magic Of Making Up". After I read it and began applying his common sense suggestions, our love life turned around. Not only that all of my personal relationships, with friends, co-workers and my family have become much smother than they were before.

You might want to check out "The Magic of Making Up" yourself.

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A Sure Deal: How to Get My Ex Back When He Has Moved On

Did you lost your young man, and are now inquiring for help on "how to get my ex back when he's moved on'? Don't bother moping, because what you have lost does not mean you have lost it forever. Underneath are some quick and easy tips for learning how to get your ex back even if he has moved on to another woman and no longer appears to be interested in associating with you.

The initial step to gaining the man of your dreams back is checking a way to win over him that he still needs you. Unless he really, really does not want anything to do with you, then there are a number of picks that you can employ from this point on.

One of the most beneficial things that you can do is simply to be his friend. Make a really good acquaintance to him, establishing him that you understand him and that you can be around him without producing any dramatic play. Display to him that you can trick around with him and have a healthy friendship with him. When the drama and stress of the relationship and detachment have subsided, he may realize that he wants you again.

You should be working a little bit hard to get, but you also want to make sure that he knows you are ready. You shouldn't totally rule out the concept of flirting and hanging out with friends, because drumming up a little bit of jealousy never hurt anyone - But it is important that you play it safe because if he doesn't think you are available, he probably will not find the motivation to pursue you.

When you communicate with your ex boyfriend, be sweet and kind to him but don't be afraid to have a little bit of mental attitude. You are going to want him to want you, but you're also going to want to give him the feeling that he cannot have you just yet. While playing games is not the best way to go, you do not want give an air of hard to get, making him more interested in the process.

Avoid acting desperate at all costs. If you act desperate, your ex boyfriend will under calculate you. You are going to want to play things cool, letting him know that you are okay with everything that has happened, and that you are willing to move on. If you act desperate, things won't work out the way you are intending them to, so avoid doing this at all costs.

Any time that you know he is looking at you, or if you feel like he is looking at you, look at him out of the corner of your eye. This sidelong glance will let him know that you are giving attention to him, but in a mysterious "you can't have me" kind of way.

Nonchalantly remind him of some of the greatest times that you have had together. These good memories will help him to remember how good the two of you used to be together. Don't bring up any bad memories, because it will only hurt his bad side, which will not do you any good.

These are just the starting steps in winning your Ex back. They are the introductory steps I followed when I lost the love of my life. And frankly these aren't my original ideas. I turned to T.W. Jackson when I had no idea of how to get my true love back.

T 'Dub' authored a simple, down to earth step by step plan called "The Magic Of Making Up". And you know, it worked like magic for us. Now we are more in love than ever.

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